"Parting is such sweet sorrow"...I coulda said it better

I don't do well with goodbyes. In fact, I just plain suck at them. I always promise myself I will see them again. But the truth is...I may not ever see them again.

When I think about all the goodbyes I will have to say looming on the horizon, my stomach ties up in knots, my throat starts to sting, my eyes look down and I have to remind myself to breathe. The connections I've made with these people may not be broken, just stretched. If I'm lucky, I will hear from them every once in a while. But they will have new lives then, new friends, and a new start. It's hard to grasp that I may not be a part of that new life. I guess the only thing that can reassure me is that, relationships that are supposed to be will be.

A pretty big goodbye is coming for me. One that I don't think I'm ready to say. I've been friends with this person for 3 years now, but it somehow feels like longer. I've never hung out with them outside of school, I've never met their family or have long talks into the night with them. But there was always the assurance that when I got into that one classroom that person would be there. I would sit down next to them and we would talk about anything. We would play games on our phones together and see who was the best at breaking bubbles. Whenever I am with them things are just nice. I guess it may seem odd that I can feel so close to someone I've never had ice cream with, but I do. This friendship comes so easy that I'm just not ready to let it go. I'm not ready to tell C goodbye. He's my advisory buddy. You just can't break a bond like that.

There is another goodbye coming. But this one is happier, it's a breaking off of one bond and joining in another. My brother is getting married. I am so excited I could just pee myself, but that doesn't mean I won't miss him being around. I don't want him to grow up and have a family, I want him to stay the fun guy who watches Avatar the last airbender with me. Maybe things won't change that much, maybe we still will watch our shows together...The good news is, I won't have to say a permanent goodbye, I will see him. And we will still be family. Woot!


Until later,


the explorer